World votes to send bin Laden to hell

Man, the sheer inconsequential nature of the average Fox News poll (which is most generously reported by this fellow) is enough to drive me to wonder how many nitwits out there just need to get a better hobby than politics:

A Fox News poll conducted May 15-17 about the killing of Bin Laden asked the usual stuff about whether voters thought it was the best outcome and whether President Obama was taking the right amount or too much credit.

Then it slipped in this question:

Do you believe Osama Bin Laden was greeted by 72 virgins in Heaven or did he meet a more negative end?

(We suppose the “negative end” was having to make do with the raisins after a career of death and destruction).

Eighty percent said he had met a negative end and only 3 percent believed he was greeted by the virgins. Seventeen percent admitted they didn’t know.

Democrats, Republicans and independents, for once, were all in agreement: no virgins.

Who the fuck cares? Is the question of Osama’s post-corporeal status really what’s driving the news polls these days? I for one will gladly put myself in the seventeen percent who say “I DON’T KNOW”, with an added “MAYBE HE’S LAUGHING BACK AT CIA HQ.” But seriously, I don’t know, and I 100% do not care.

Most people care more about the alleged porn stash that they found during the raid in Abbottabingbangboom than whether it has any real consequence. I tend to agree, because while that may seem inconsequential to most, it really means that somewhere in the WH record system there is a secret memo with some very salacious porn titles (after all, it’s some State Department bureaucrat’s job to source these things properly, which is probably not a half bad job). That was probably a fun oval office briefing for the guys.

2 Comments
  1. I think he won’t never be in Heaven… He killed many people…I hate him, i wish i can kill him by myself , so i can be rich, hahaha

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