South Park Episode on 9/11 Conspiracies

This is the kiss of death for the “Bush was behind 9/11” bozos, and I’m happy to share these three clips of the episode posted on YouTube:

Part 2 & 3 after the jump.

I’ve been of the mindset for a long time that the government is far too incompetent to pull off 9/11, and it seems Matt and Trey are on my side on this one. Feels extra good to be on the common sense side of libertarianism watching this.

I still expect our resident conspiracy readers to fill the comments with links to websites and “truth.”

Haha… retards.

Stephen VanDyke

I've published HoT along with about 300+ friends since 2002. We're all Americans who are snarky and love our country. I'm a libertarian that registered Republican because I like to win elections. That's pretty much it.

  1. I’ve actually spent quite a bit of time documenting government incompetence in general, and some time documenting the specific incompetence that allowed “19 lunatics led by a guy in a cave in Afghanistan” to penetrate airport security and do the damage they did.

    And after investigating all the major claims they’ve made, I’m pretty sure the conspiracy nuts are, well, nuts.

  2. “19 lunatics led by a guy in a cave in Afghanistan”to penetrate airport security and do the damage they did.

    Oh you forgot that they used box cutters.

    If you believe that, then I must assert that you are the “nut”.

  3. This is hilarious! Let’s hope rational Libertarians separate themselves from these conspiracy freaks now.

    Hey, check this out. A bigtime Las Vegas bookie just called himself a “Libertarian Republican” and predicted the GOP will lose the Congress by a couple seats, cause they are not “Libertarian Republican enough.”

    Full story at

  4. The Bush Campaign is SOO incompetent that they could never get elected governor of Texas or president of the United States.

    Only a retard could think they could pull off 9/11!

  5. Bush failed at every business endeavor he was ever involved in. Without his father’s money to bail him out, he would be a homeless drifter addicted to booze and/or drugs at this moment.

    money can fix many things, but theres no amount of money that can fix what he’s done. The Republican Party will be finished as a major political party in less than 10 years, and probably closer to 5 to 6. We’re on the edge of a major political re-alignment in America, on the magnatude of a 1852. I may even survive long nough to see it come about.

  6. And yet Cheney and the FBI admit they have no connection of Osama to 9/11.

    I’ll believe the government THEORY as soon as they can prove it.

    Good luck… retards :)

  7. Excellent comment by Timothy West. Another great article on Bush’s business acumen — cough, cough — was Joe Conason’s excellent article in Harper’s (Feb. 2000), titled, “Notes on a Native Son: A Heartwarming tale about baseball, $1.7 billion, and a lot of swell friends.” Except for the 2,400% return on a $606,000 investment in the sale of the Texas Rangers in 1998 — a sale sweetened by the taxpayers of Arlington who put up $135 million in building a brand new shiny stadium for Dubya and the other owners — every one of Bush’s business endeavors turned out to be a disaster, with most of his investors losing their shirts. Yet even his initial $606,000 investment in the Texas Rangers — his one so-called “success” — was the result of money borrowed from family friends.

    Tim, I hope you’re right about a major political re-alignment — and I hope the LP is in a position to play a major role in such a realignment!





  9. Actually, this was still good news overall for those not drinking government kook-aid.

    Traffic to all the 911 sites jumped considerably, particularly among the youngins.

    Every blog posting helps… Thanks!

  10. How come the Libertarian Party gets stuck with the 1/4 of the population that is retarded?

    The Hardly Boys needs to solve that mystery with their raging clues.

  11. The South Park guys forgot the “911 truth ‘tards” think they’re in a popularity contest. So it’s natural they would think there is no such thing as bad publicity. Because bad publicity also makes money. Don’t forget, most 911 conspiracy crap is re-rehashed paranoid make believe from almost five years ago. The only thing that’s been proved since then is the amount of money the “truth gurus” have scored for themselves with their “Million Little Pieces ‘o Crap”. Whatever “loose change” remains is obviously for the suckers.

  12. Darcy,

    we will arrive at a tipping point within a few years. What’s missing as of now is a John Brown to push the issue(s).

  13. Hahahaha. South Park just keeps getting better and better. I honestly think it is the smartest show in existence right now, despite the offensiveness and the bathroom humor.

  14. It would be wise to know what your talking about before you atempt to belittle other opinions. And when you realize Bush was kept in the dark about 911 by the real government you will realize were all screwed!

  15. Mr. West, I really wish I shared your optimism. Let’s see if the Democrats can even take the House. Am I a crazy conspiracy kook to think that the election results may not be 100% honest? If the GOP doesn’t get killed in ’06, then I’m going to give a serious look at the evidence of vote manipulation and fraud.

    I hope that if the GOP does meet its end, that the American people will be able to see that two parties is just not enough. Seem impossible? Well, if they can get beyond the pre-eminence of THESE two parties, perhaps they can see that there doesn’t have to be JUST two parties. A third party will emerge and automatically lend credibility to the potential emerge of additional parties. If your prognostication is accurate.

  16. By “real government,” I assume you’re referring to the Communist cabal that is led by (Jewish) bankers and other (free trade) globalists? Please! Don’t let them make me use the Amero!!!

  17. By “real government,” I assume you’re referring to the Communist cabal that is led by (Jewish) bankers and other (free trade) globalists? Please! Don’t let them make me use the Amero!!!


  18. almost all observers did not see the fall of the Soviet Union. Even one year before the collapse, if you suggested the end was near, you were laughed at. At most, what most assumed would happen was a bloody end to Glasnost and Perastroika, followed by a clampdown and ressertion of control. The idea that the battle of ideologies had been decided took a while to sink in.

    world events almost always either happen inperceptably slow or inconcieveably fast, and never in the order assumed. :)

  19. “Am I a crazy conspiracy kook to think that the election results may not be 100% honest? If the GOP doesn’t get killed in ”˜06, then I’m going to give a serious look at the evidence of vote manipulation and fraud.” — undercover_anarchist.

    Hell, no. That’s a genuine concern. Everyone knows about Ohio in 2004 and the 2000 debacle in Florida (although the real theft wasn’t the “hanging chads” or the “butter-fly ballot” in South Florida, but the wholesale disenfranchisement that took place in Jacksonville, where 27,000 votes were tossed out, including 19,000 in the city’s predominately African-American ninth ward.) Supposedly, the voters in that district voted for two presidential candidates, including thousands who allegedly voted for Gore and Howard Phillips! Give me a break. To this day, nobody has ever examined those ballots.

    Given Bobby Kennedy, Jr.’s reporting on this subject, I wouldn’t put it past this fascist regime to electronically steal the 2006 mid-terms, too.

  20. This site has seemed to go the way of Bill O’ Reilly…. sad.

    “You’re like the guys who believe space aliens kidnapped Elvis. Number one, you hate your country, and number two, you’re a loon.” Bill O’ Reilly

    Was the government behind it?… Who knows? Are terrorists competent enough to pull off that horrible attack, but not the leaders of the most powerful nation in the world? Could they have just let it happen?

    Who here believes a word the government says anyways?

    Isn’t it funny though that we ended up in Iraq and are destroying their country when they had nothing to do with it??

    I guess I should just stop questioning my government… how retarded of me…

  21. I think Matt and Trey have done the best reverse psych job of this: they lay out all of the 911 stuff, and then only disprove it by saying “Oh, well Bush _wants _ you to think he did it.”

    If anything, this SP episode is more likely to make people question, since the right questions are asked.

    The first 2 thirds of the show are right on the money, and it’s only the last 3rd where they ‘south park’ it into parody.

  22. Our enemies are our friends. Our friends are our enemies. George Bush was the driving force behind the Chicago riots in 1968 during the Democratic National Convention. White people are really African-Americans in disguise. Muslims believe in peace and will help you with money, food and clothes. They will even give you free oil. Just ask them for it. North Korea is our secret ally against the space invaders. Iran really loves Jews and they are secret Jews of the lost tribe. Great Britian is the true enemy of the world. The Constitution does not exist nor did George Washington. The United States is only a figment of your imagination. The real name is Moonbeam Pointy Head Nation Of The Solemn Dummies. Karl Marx was a free market economist. If you think it, it must be true. Native Americans want us to give them a submarine so they can live free under water.

    To you dumb ass conspiracy theorists, the above makes as much sense as you do. Retards, retards, retards, to you.

  23. The first 2 thirds of the show are right on the money, and it’s only the last 3rd where they ‘south park’ it into parody.

    Especially the part where Kyle was responsible for 9/11, as well as the rest of the Jews, LOL.

  24. This was a great Southpark I laughed so hard I had t watch it 3 times to hear the entire show. I just hope that the conspiracy theorists don’t get any “clue glue” on my leg :)

  25. Julian said;

    “To you dumb ass conspiracy theorists, the above makes as much sense as you do. Retards, retards, retards, to you.”

    Are you suggesting it wasn’t a conspiracy, and only one person was able to hijack 4 airplanes at the same time, and also line 3 skyscrapers with explosives?

    How could the same person fly 2 airplanes at the same time, let alone 4?

    You have just set the record in retardedness.

  26. Julius Caesar

    Read the following very carefully so you will know exactly what I think of you and your conspiracy theories.


    You are also a dumbass.

  27. Julian,

    It is just an observation. Your son calls those that question a government that is well-known to lie to people “retards”, as do you. If that is an insult to you, then maybe one of you should change your position.

  28. Mike Nelson

    I profoundly apologize to you for hurting your tender little girlie feelings. I had no idea you were so in touch with your feminine side. You are not a retard, you are a girlie-boy.

  29. Stephen Van Dyke

    I am laughing myself right out of my chair. I had no idea people on this site were so sensitive. What an irony, some of them beat up on those they disagree with and name call much worse than calling someone a retard. I swear, this is absolutely hilarious and borders on these people being a bunch of retards, I mean morons. I had no idea retard was such a dirty, insulting word. Where have I been? I guess we must be politically correct so I will not use retard again. They are really better known as mental midgets or is it mental dwarfs? Maybe I should call them mental little people or mentally height challenged.

    Now I am laughing at the mental picture I have of those on this site being short people that are also retards.

  30. The most important question raise by all of this is… why DO some kids dook in the urinals at elementary schools?

    I remember this was a big deal when I was in elementary school. There was a serial dooker who would take a dump in the urinal almost every day. The school administration put a lot of resources into finding out who it was, but I’m not sure they ever did. And, several friends have told me that this happened at their elementary schools, too.

    Why do kids do this? What is the motivation?

  31. Building 7 was brought down by explosives just look at the way it comes down even Silverstein says he had the build pulled,I don’t know why people think that’s a conspiracy theory?’s fact!

    Some things I find hard to believe that are coincidences.

    A:The U.S goverment was having one of the biggest exercises ever of hijacked planes and terrorist attackes just hours before the real 9/11 attacks took place.

    B:Not one plane was able to intercept the hijacked planes even though there is a airfore base just miles away from the pentagon.

    C:The only four planes that had less then 40% of it’s seat filled were the planes that were hijacked,ever other jet in the sky had over 70% full.

    D: The only side of the pentagon that was finished being reinforced was the same side the plane hit.

    E:Atleast six of the hijackers that were supposivly killed during 9/11 are actually still alive and the goverment doesn’t argue against this.

    it goes on and on,how can people no believe this it’s fact!

  32. re: Crazy nutjobs

    No, building seven was in fact not brought down by explosives despite what your conspiracy buddies might tell you.

    “Screw Loose Change” and “Loose Change Guide” spent a lot of attention on this. I suggest you learn so you can stop looking like a fool.

  33. “All truth passes through three stages. First, it is ridiculed. Second, it is violently opposed. Third, it is accepted as being self-evident.”

    –Arthur Schopenhauer, German philosopher (1788 – 1860)

  34. It’s the “Normal” people who believe there’s only one “real world” and it’s the one THEY’RE living in. It’s the “Normal” people who kill each other over differences in that reality, and if someone can’t trick themselves into ignoring the millions of inconsistencies or can’t gloss over the gaping flaws in that reality-construct, or can’t even pretend convincingly that they believe that flimsy and self-contradictory world is ALL TRUE, rather than have their own illusory stability undermined or accept that other ways of thinking and seeing might be valid, the “Normal” people imprison those “mentally ill,” and experimentally destroy their personalities by use of drugs, electroconvulsion, and brain surgery.

    ACT NORMAL you damn conspiracy retards!

  35. “No, building seven was in fact not brought down by explosives despite what your conspiracy buddies might tell you.

    “Screw Loose Change” and “Loose Change Guide” spent a lot of attention on this. I suggest you learn so you can stop looking like a fool.

    Comment by Mark”

    why don’t you prove that building 7 wasn’t brought down by explosives then? I think your the fool for believing every word the goverment says.People like you arethe reason why the goverment get’s away with things like this because you are Brainwashed!

  36. You know, it doesn’t happen often but Julian’s right on the money here. So is UA.

    Anyone who’s so offended by the word “retard” ought to consider that we regularly call each other far worse. The purist crowd has called us reality-based libertarians “statists,” “Marxists,” “fascists” and the like. Hell, Tom Knapp once compared the LRC to the fucking Nazis, kids. We’ve countered back with plenty of invective of our own. The Badnarik campaign’s had plenty of attacks hurled at them.

    And really, how is it that we can have posts calling Democrats and Republicans the dirtiest names in the book but can’t take a few hits ourselves?

    Grow some thicker skin, kids. And if you are seriously offended by this, that’s just what you are… a kid.

  37. I’ve noticed this tendency for a while, where everyone wants HoT to be this whitewashed little news service where nobody ever says anything naughty. That’s not what we do. This place has bad words, you will disagree with it sometimes, that’s just how it rolls. If you can live with that, it can actually be pretty fun, as well as informative. Just stop being so fucking uptight.

  38. A good example of how conspiracists distort facts. Claim: Truth Movement has huge majority because 83% reject Official story. Actually what the poll showed was that a huge majority think the Bush administration hide what they knew in advance. Not that they think some govt plot was behind 9/11 just that the govt blundered and is hiding that. That is pretty obvious but this is not what the lunatics mean. I saw one bogus poll used where you go and sign up for it. Meaning conspiracy sites promote it, their nutcases go and vote and then they use that poll to prove their case. Alex Jones did that. These people are dishonest wack jobs. Join the Constitution Party with the other nuts.

  39. When I first saw this episode, I thought that they might be defending the conspiracy theory. Thank god I underestimated them. By the time Mike Nelson can begin to grow a beard, I am sure he will have the wisdom to understand that there are always some miniscule truths to all conspiracy theories although they are nonetheless false.

  40. “9/11 Press for Truth” and “Everybody’s Gotta Learn Sometime” are historical pieces that do not deal with fringe conspiracy theories like demolition or “what hit the pentagon”.

    For the real story of the unanswered questions, check out these two videos on google video.

    I’m sure the widows and other family members of victims that are in these films would appreciate being called “retards”.

  41. “I’ve been of the mindset for a long time that the government is far too incompetent to pull off 9/11,…”



    Alex Peak
    Membership Chair, College Libertarians of Towson

  42. *just dawns on him*

    Alex, I’ve got a friend going to Towson, she’s a geology major.

    Anyway, I checked out your club’s site… very cool stuff.

  43. The impact of the planes cannot have caused enough damage to bring the buildings down, since the buildings were designed to withstand them (as Frank DeMartini, the project manager, has observed), the planes that hit were very similar to those they were designed to withstand, and they continued to stand after those impacts with negligible effects.

    The melting point of steel at 2,800*F is about 1,000*F higher than the maximum burning temperature of jet-fuel-based fires, which do not exceed 1,800*F under optimal conditions, so the fires cannot have caused the steel to melt, which means that melting steel did not bring the buildings down.

    UL certified the steel in the buildings up to 2,000*F for for three or four hours before it would even significantly weaken, where these fires burned too low and too briefly at an average temperature of around 500*F–about one hour in the South Tower and one and a half in the North–to have even caused the steel to weaken, much less melt.

    If the steel had melted or weakened, the affected floors would have displayed completely different behavior, with some asymmetrical sagging and tilting, which would have been gradual and slow, not the complete, abrupt, and total demolition that was observed.

    William Rodriguez, the senior custodian in the North Tower and the last man to leave the building, has reported massive explosions in the subbasements that effected extensive destruction, including the demolition of a 50-ton hydraulic press and ripping the skin off a fellow worker, a report corroborated by the testimony of around three dozen other custodians.

    Willie reported that the explosion occurred prior to the airplane’s impact, a claim that has now been substantiated in a new study by Craig Furlong and Gordon Ross, “Seismic Proof: 9/11 was an Inside Job”, which demonstrates that these explosions actually took place as much as 14 and 17 seconds prior to the airplanes impacts.

    Heavy steel construction buildings like the Twin Towers, built with more than 100,000 tons of steel, are not even capable of “pancake collapse”, which normally only occurs with concrete structures of “lift slab” construction and could not occur in “redundant” welded-steel buildings, such as the towers, unless every supporting column were removed at the same time, as Charles Pegelow has pointed out to me.

    The destruction of the South Tower in 10 seconds and of the North in 9 is even faster than free fall with only air resistance, which would have taken at least 12 seconds, which, as Judy Wood has emphasized, is an astounding result that would have been impossible without extremely powerful explosives.

    The towers are exploding from the top, not collapsing to the ground, where the floors do not move, a phenomenon that Judy Wood has likened to two gigantic trees turning to sawdust from the top down, which, like the pulverization of the concrete, the official account cannot possibly explain.

    Pools of molten metal were found at the subbasement levels three, four, and five weeks later, an effect that could not have been produced by the plane-impact/jet-fuel-fire/pancake collapse scenario, which, of course, implies that it was not produced by such a cause.

    WTC-7 came down in a classic controlled demolition at 5:20 PM/ET after Larry Silverstein suggested the best thing to do might be to “pull it”, displaying all the characteristics of classic controlled demolitions, including a complete, abrupt, and total collapse into its own footprint, where the floors are all falling at the same time, and so forth, an event so embarrassing to the official account that it is not even mentioned in THE 9/11 COMMISSION REPORT.

    The hit point at the Pentagon was too small to accommodate a 100-ton airliner with a 125-foot wingspan and a tail that stands 44 feet above the ground; the kind and quantity of debris was wrong for a Boeing 757: no wings, no fuselage, no seats, no bodies, no luggage, no tail! Which means that the building was not hit by a Boeing 757!

    The Pentagon’s own videotape does not show a Boeing 757 hitting the building, as even Bill O’Reilly admitted when it was shown on “The Factor”; but at 155 feet, the plane was more than twice as long as the 71-foot Pentagon is high and should have been present and visible; it was not, which means that the building was not hit by a Boeing 757!

    The aerodynamics of flight would have made the official trajectory–flying at high speed barely above ground level–physically impossible; and if it had come it at an angle instead, it would have created a massive crater; but there is no crater and the government has no way out, which means that the building was not hit by a Boeing 757!

    If Flight 93 had come down as advertised, then there would have been a debris field of about a city block in size, but in fact the debris is distributed over an area of about eight square miles, which would be explainable if the plane had been shot down in the air but not if it had crashed as required by the government’s official scenario.

    There are more, especially about the alleged hijackers, including that they were not competent to fly the planes; their names were not on any passenger manifest; they were not subject to any autopsy; several have turned up alive and well; tthe cell phone calls appear to have been impossible; on and on. The evidence may be found at

  44. Jim,

    Don’t try to confuse them with facts, it doesn’t work. Ad hominem is more suitable to their level of mentality.

  45. The 9/11 South Park was not the “kiss of death” for the 9/11 Truthers. If anything, in the long run, they will benefit from the exposure. The offical version of what happened that day is totally physically impossible. Regardless of how much the truth is attacked and ridiculed by the likes of South Park, Penn & Teller, Free Talk Live and Hammer of Truth (all GREAT shows IMHO), the truth can’t be suppressed forever.

    How can I be so certain about 9/11? Just look at WTC Buildings 3, 4, 5 & 6 which were right underneath Buildings 1 & 2. They got totally creamed, but the steel structures remained. WTC Building 7 was barely scratched and suffered TOTAL COLLAPSE. Come on people. This is just one of hundreds of smoking guns.

    Oh, and I’ve never minded being called a retard in the past for my libertarian/free market anarchy views in the past. Bring it on! I am a successful embedded software engineer, so I know in my own heart that I must not be 100% retarded…

  46. Alex Truthberg said;

    “How can I be so certain about 9/11? Just look at WTC Buildings 3, 4, 5 & 6 which were right underneath Buildings 1 & 2. They got totally creamed, but the steel structures remained. WTC Building 7 was barely scratched and suffered TOTAL COLLAPSE. Come on people. This is just one of hundreds of smoking guns.”

    Ever noticed how lame the sheeple’s response to this is?

    Right on Alex.

  47. Thanks for the friendly comments. I’m happy that HoT encourages the open-forum style debate. I also like the sound of “Truthberg”… haha.

    Most everyone, in time, will wake up and start believing the truth (except of course for Ian of Free Talk Live, who seems permanently tied to his “It Doesn’t Matter At All” position… which I think is the craziest of all opinions, but he’s entitled to it, I guess…)

    For anyone still unsure or who’s new to the debate, check out the new video (on Google) called “9/11 Mysteries” (also linked at They detail the nature of the collapses of the 3 WTC buildings in a very informative fashion. All the debunking sites avoid the serious questions, or just plain lie. The Popular Mechanics 9/11 Truth debunking article is a sham!

    I personally loved the South Park episode. It was brilliantly done.

    Alex Truberg

    P.S. Oops, I accidently classified Hammer of Truth as a “show” in my last e-mail… of course, it’s a website, not a show!

  48. “Jim Fetzer

    Who are you, a rocket scientist or just a retard.

    Comment by Julian”

    Wow, intelligent response Julian. You should engage Mr. Fetzer in a public debate. Would be very entertaining.

  49. South Park still rocks despite this episode, and I still like HoT despite this retarded post.

    Julian must be a rocket scientist himself, since only rocket scientists are allowed to disagree with him. I can forgive him thinking we are all retards since he says he has a “peanut brain”.

  50. Steel buildings in the US are designed based on Load-and-Resistence-Factor Design (LRFD) of 1.4 x Dead Load + 1.7 x Live Load. Steel loses half its strength around 600F and 90% around 800F. And that’s just static load to explain one floor collapsing. The gravity force of 20+ floors accelerating at 9.8m/s is orders of magnitude greater than any local static deformations, causing an overall linear “pancake” collapse. Do the math.

  51. Paulie, what steel buildings are you referring to?

    A building collapses when the load exceeds the design strength. The strength of a steel beam or column depends on the member’s shape, span, alloy, connections, and temperature. The steel temperature depends on the temperature of the materials burning, the confinement of the fire, the degree of fireproofing, and any sprinkler systems.

    All of this can be readily calculated using the laws of physics and well known material properties.