Religious Fanatics… Hooray!

Muhammed is the bombThere’s nothing more annoying these days than to watch religious fanatics, be it Muslim, Christian, Jewish or whatnot get all crazy up in the house and burn shit down. And then there’s the political fanatics like communism who want to turn the state into a church. So really… there’s a bunch of crazy fuckers in the world, which is why a self-defense should always be the libertarian foreign policy. Keep your crazy fanaticism over there and we won’t nuke you off the planet.

What’s funny is that after a few millennia with prophets of peace telling us about universal love, the same people who preach this nonsense the loudest are the ones advocating fire and brimstone on other religions. Pat Robertson and Osama Bin Laden, I’m pointing at you.

I think the Danish cartoons that causing so much unrest in the world are a bit too tame: Muhammed with a bomb in his turban? Don’t make me laugh. Instead, I’d like to see the true depiction of what’s wrong with religion. Why doesn’t someone draw Bin Laden fucking Muhammed up the ass right next to Robertson fucking Jesus up the ass, because that’s reality. That’s the problem with religious fanatics.

Stephen VanDyke

I've published HoT along with about 300+ friends since 2002. We're all Americans who are snarky and love our country. I'm a libertarian that registered Republican because I like to win elections. That's pretty much it.

  1. Praising the lord (whichever lord you choose to worship) is like anything else- moderation is key.

  2. Amen AND preach on!

    But aren’t you worried about repercussions? You not only posted one of the verboten cartoons, you also suggested sex between bin Laden and a long-dead guy! Now you’re gonna get it from the gay-rights groups AND have a jihad on your noggin… and maybe an IRS audit and a visit from the NSA…

    Live dangerously, dude. Screw ’em if they can’t take a joke.

  3. You know how they tried to “turn the tables” by having a design contest for anti-christian comics? Well I’m not the least bit offended and I’m a christian. MOCK MY GOD all you want. I’m not insecure in my faith, I still believe that those who don’t accept Jesus Christ will end up in hell but I’m not a fanatic and I’m not rubbing peoples faces in bibles all day. These muslims REALLY have no grasp of what free speech is.

  4. Keith,

    Not just content with the offending Christians and Moslems, I just took on tofu-heads, too.

    No fears, though, as we are moving to a top secret server location this afternoon (if all goes well).

  5. Any religion that’s threatened by the publication of satirical cartoons has some serious insecurities. Furthermore, regardless of offense, it’s not okay to kill people for making fun of your religion.

    Tolerance of intolerance will not be tolerated.

    Yours truly,

  6. I thought Muhammed was a pedophile. Didn’t he marry a 5 year old or something? Or maybe she was 9? Something like that.
    All these religions started with some freaks. And now Mikey Jacksonian will sing “songs of the pope” on his next album.
    Will he use the Vienna Boys Chior after a round of Jesus Juice?

  7. Fundamental lessons in art:

    10 mistakes conservatives make in art and entertainment, 02/07/2006

    Mistake #9: We protest and boycott bad art and entertainment. Type the words “conservative” and “protest” into Google’s search engine and more than fifteen million hits appear. Writing angry letters, filing FCC complaints, and boycotting advertisers are rarely, if ever, effective. Here’s the answer: ignore the bad, praise the good.

    Mistake #10: We like safe art. Soggy may be a better term. Easy to digest. Nothing that causes heartburn. Do we really want art that never challenges our convictions, wrestles with our beliefs, or questions our faith? Let’s not forget: beauty is hardly safe, truth is never tame, goodness is anything but trite.

  8. “Muhammed with a bomb in his turban?”

    The idea is that his head is the bomb–his beliefs about as conducive to human life as a violent explosion.

  9. Someone draw a disparaging Scientology cartoon. I wanna see THOSE freaks try rioting and burning shit down… Nah, those idiots just file lawsuits.

    I’d do it, but I’m busy doodling an anti-Buddhist cartoon. I want to get ’em riled up so bad, they’ll be outside my house, trying to clap with one hand…

    Oh, and Gordon: Where’s this sweet secret location? One of Cheney’s hideouts? Tell him he still owes me fifty bucks.

  10. I left not to comment again but I cannot pass this one up. Stephen V., thank you for having the guts to stand up for freedom of speech.

    What the hell? Is the Allah of Islam not a strong Power? Can he or the “prophet” not take care of themselves but require religious zealot nazis to riot, burn, destroy and kill? I would not want to worship a God that is weak and had to call on mere mortals to defend Him as a Diety. I want a God that can take care of Himself/Herself even if someone drew cartoons depicting His so called Prophet.

    Stephen, I guess the radical Muslims will torch your website. I hope so. There will be a lot of computers and moniters on fire and maybe those assholes will burn their own Mosques and houses down while doing so.

  11. 1) The cartoon “contest” being put on by an Iran”-ese” (?) newspaper, is for “drawings of the Holocaust” which really seems more Anti-Semitic.

    2) The original newspaper to publish the cartoon of Mohammed wishes to publish these drawings the same day the Iran newspaper does for the first time. (I.e.; they are attempting to cooperate with the Iran newspaper.) To this I say, “Sheer Genius.”

    3) To Keith Rodgers re: Scientology — South Park beat you to it. They dedicated an entire episode. The most amusing part to me of that episode is twofold; A) the credits B) The voice-actor of “Chef” is supposedly a scientologist.

    4) I really like bullet points.

  12. Julian,
    I don’t presume to know which religion or faith, if any, you choose to follow, but I thought some of you might be interested in some of the more esoteric information out there about one of the other major ones. Back in the 4th century CE when what is now commonly known as Christianty was deciding which of the many available texts to include in its New Testament, there was much debate and argument over the true nature and teachings of the man known as Jesus. Eventually, through mostly political means, the books that we now have were decided on. Groups such as the Gnostics, the Essenes, and others were persecuted in much the same way that Julian described in his last post: their property destroyed, books burned, bodies murdered, etc. So as you can see, the group that now calls themselves the Christians and claims to follow the Bible and the teachings of Jesus are subject to many of the same questions you ask of religion of Islam. Is there God not strong enough to defend himself?

  13. Dauntless

    It is the acts of men that are repugnent, not the God of Abraham, the God that Christians, Jews and Muslims CLAIM to worship. Is not God strong and resilient enough to survive insults and even cartoons no matter which group behaves is a stupid way?

    It is the actions of man driven by fanatics they choose to follow whether it be Hitler or some self-proclaimed righteous Imam that creates the mayhem and killing, not a Supreme being. Don’t blame God, blame the stupidity of dumb ass mortals.

    Maybe war and death is a natural occurance of evolution for population control. If so, let’s get it on. There are too many asses taking up room on this planet that need to meet their 72 virgins.

  14. Julian
    I agree with you that it is the acts of men that are repugnant, not the God that created those men. However, there are many greedy and self-righteous beings on this planet that have violently taken over the teachings of the few Enlightened Ones that have walked the various lands of this Earth. I definitely don’t blame God for this. In fact I thank Him every day for the free will we were each given to make the decisions that we make on a daily basis. Unfortunately, it seems to me that many of the souls on this planet (at least unconsciously) enjoy living under the authoritarian lifestyle that these beings have set up on this planet. (Matrix, anyone?) I don’t happen to be one of them (hence my libertarian leanings), but I definitely don’t wish physical harm on those that are. We have plenty of resources here to go around (the greedy ones just prohibit the sharing), and even if they were all killed, most of them will be required to reincarnate as newborns anyway. Back to square one

  15. The radical elements of Islam are the true nature of Islam. Islam must be understood by THE SOURCE materials – the Koran and the Hadiths. The Hadiths are the history and sayings of the “prophet” Mohammed. To truly understand the Koran, it must be understood by way of the Hadiths. The Hadiths reveal the nature of this “prophet”. This “prophet” was a murdering, thieving, pedophile(ing), lying, raping, etc. ‘convert or die’ kind of guy that you did not want to cross. Yet, he was a brilliant warrior. Muslims are taught that Mohammed is THE example for all Muslims. Many Muslims don’t even know the true history of this man – but yet many do. Those who do and are taught Mohammed is the epitome of a true follower of Allah will put into practice Mohammed’s words AND DEEDS. From the beginning of this “prophet” and his religion terrorizing the Arabia of his day some 1400 years ago, Islam has been the aggressor. The Koran and especially the Hadiths contain some of the most vile and hateful sayings and practices. No other (sane) religion is even a close second place. Remember, to Muslims, the Koran is sacred to them and the Hadiths are a very close second. To be a ‘good’ Muslim, you must take the good texts AND ACCEPT (follow and believe) the BAD texts. Much, much more could be stated about the history of this violent and aggressive religion. The “what about the Crusades?” thing does not work anymore either. The Muslims started it centuries BEFORE the Crusades.