Heritage Foundation Immigration Policy


The Heritage Foundation proudly boasts the following:

The principles upon which the United States is established encourage immigration from certain western European countries and force promote the transformation of those “yearning to breathe free” into Americans, welcoming white newcomers while mandating insisting that they learn English and embrace America’s racist civic culture and vote Republican political institutions. The federal government has a duty to carry out these principles in its policies, while ensuring that U.S. borders are both secure from Mexican islamofascists and open to the giant sucking sound commerce.

When at the AFF debate the other night, Wonkette’s Alex Pareene and I decided to determine if Heritage actually practices what they preach. While stepping out to grab some nicotine, I asked the INS official security guard if we could get back in the building after we finished our cigarettes. Using customer service skills sure to make a NKVD border guard proud, she informed us that the doors were locked and no one could enter the building. Considering that the guards were standing in sight of the doorway and there were only two of us out there (and a whole lot of people in the building), this didn’t seem such a monumental request to me.

I did see one Republican looking person able to cross into the Vaterland Heritage Foundation building, but when Alex tried (see photographic evidence above), his efforts were rebuffed. Their border security held, even without the assistance of Jim Gilchrist and the Minutemen. I might disagree with conservative immigration policy, but they should at least be applauded for their consistency.

Stephen Gordon

I like tasteful cigars, private property, American whiskey, fast cars, hot women, pre-bailout Jeeps, fine dining, worthwhile literature, low taxes, original music, personal privacy and self-defense rights -- but not necessarily in this order.

  1. When school’s out, and if you can get permission, perhaps you could go to Mexico and encourage them to open up their borders to all the Guatemalans and others yearning to breathe free. I really don’t think your ideas are ever going to take hold here, so please give Mexico a shot.

  2. Maybe next time he should go in a uniform? Might be easier. Or you could just fire up inside and watch the rent a thugs squirm? Sadly, the message that Heritage is spewing is embraced by a whole lot of neo-libertarians so they have an audience.

  3. Damn dude, you’re laying it on so thick with the smarmy sarcasm here that I can barely understand what you’re trying to say (“Communications Director”?!?). Are you trying to say that you were singled-out for persecution due to political views, or are you saying that they were just a$$holes in general and probably didn’t even know who you two are?

    What’s a “Republican-looking person”? You mean like Sarwark?

  4. So you’re upset that you couldn’t feed your addiction and you’re taking it out by rewriting their policy as you see it?
    Lots of events lock the doors once they start. That doesn’t make the people running the event the Gestapo. Steve Perkins has an excellent point.

  5. Steve and Tom,

    Mostly I was just having fun with the opportune photograph I snapped.

    The world is not always some profound political statement; sometimes it’s cool just to laugh at ourselves from time to tome.