Point/Counterpoint: Touchy Feely Elections

Drudge Report broke it originally. The story, or buzz, was that Kerry and Edwards were getting really close, and there was a lot of physical contact. Things were exacerbated when press photos began to pour in, the two men were never more than a few inches from each other for a the first few days. Which led to a lot of jokes, as expected. Matt Drudge smelled something fishy about the photo-ops and posted an incendiary page — filled with appeared to be hyperbole and backed with photographic evidence — under the headline Can’t Keep Hands Off Each Other:

Hugs, kisses to the cheek, affectionate touching of the face, caressing of the back, grabbing of the arm, fingers to the neck, rubbing of the knees…

John Kerry and John Edwards can’t keep their hands off each other!

In the past 48 hours, “candidate handling” has become the top buzz on the trail.

News photographers have been going wild with photos of the two Johns.

But then the reality hammer came down from AngryFinger in the form of a photographic rebuttal — George Bush hugging and grasping hands with several people — and a satirical alteration of Drudge’s original text. Under the title of Matt Drudge is a Douchebag, the entry dealt a visceral lashing while constrasting the recent hoopla with history:

Hugs, kisses to the cheek, affectionate touching of the face, caressing of the back, grabbing of the arm, fingers to the neck, rubbing of the knees, sitting effeminately…

George Bush just can’t keep his hands off every guy he sees!

When asked if the George was acting out a cynical focus group series of poses — perhaps to show warmth — a Bush spokesperson explained: “No, I think Matt Drudge is just a douchebag.”

Drudge Report/AngryFinger - point/counterpoint

I do find it funny that both of these are grand displays of public relations at it’s finest. After all, who would want to see these politicians as they really are? Foul-mouthed leeches and looters who are working 100% of the time to convince us that they are here to help us and work for us while they slide the knife between our shoulderblades and lift the wallet out of our pockets.

Can’t Keep Hands Off Each Other [Drudge Report]
Matt Drudge is a Douchebag [AngryFinger]

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